If I go to jail what happens to my debt?
You dont have to pay it.
I'm going to jail.
Instead of asking if I had a condom she literally said " I'm not on the pill but I'm pro choice... your move"... I'm in love
At least you didnt end up topless in a Tina Turner wig singing cabaret tunes
I hope whoever gets these locks of love doesn't have a drug test anytime soon
I just masturbated mid-day, thinking of you
I think that is one of the most romantic things I have ever heard from a fuck buddy on v-day, there is a strong possibility that you will soon be my girlfriend.
He gave me a book last time I slept there. Im beginning to feel like a really weird hooker. Like instead of money he gives me random shit he has lying around. like hamburger buns
Good thing I took the morning after pill cuz I pretty much had packaged seamen in me like I was a squirrel saving it for later or something
Woke up today to the sound of church bells. My first thought was shit the apocalypse, but then I remembered my hook up lives next to a church. This might be a rough day.
He stole a bottle of grenadine from the bar. And got arrested. His new cell mate is going to love his bright red lips.
The best part about living in a college town is the annual rush of senior girls who want to get in their lesbian experiment before they graduate.
Me and him getting it in is for special occasions only. Like Christmas and when they bring the McRib back.
No, and she still hasn't answered me...I get a whole series of text messages about Guatemalan anal bleaching but no fucking answer to my question.
Do you think if I had a tempurpedic bed he would still be able to feel me fingering myself after we have sex?
I thought the dude was just really enjoying his piss but apparently he was jerkin off into the urinal.
i realized my signature handshake has now become a hookup. i love what college has done to me.
Randomize