So i'm in mason getting an ultrasound.. and there are a bunch of hicks in here with their wild ass children and this one young mom yells at her kid "harley sit!"
You should introduce yourself as garth. As in garth brooks.
I love that she's always that person who people think it's a good idea to invite her to something. and then she's there and you realize, "nope."
Whatever it was. it was pregnant.
Busta Rhymes just yelled at me! He cut a song off and I was clapping and he looked right at me and said "don't fucking clap." I was that white guy.
you tried to clear everyones facebook status so that yours would be the only one on everyones home page
and then she yelled "im going to fuck the next guy that walks by me". so ya thats how i lost my virginity
It smells like ranch
Must be all the white people
You guys crashed sarahs vespa into a snowbank and its still there. not cool.
I was more than drunk as hell I have rug burn on my elbows from ninja roles on the ground..
Based on the grey fur I pulled from my teeth, I think her vagina has mice.
Then, she put flavored warming oil on my dick and was amazed when something she bought FROM SPENCER'S almost burned my dick off.
I feel awkward giving career advice while naked
Just cried because I'm out of oreos. This post-molly depression can go fuck itself.
Ive already seen two fights and a clown urinating in the middle of the street. Hello Halloween 2014.
Well I only snuggle him I don't hump him. That's rude.
Randomize
