your butthole totally puckers for the ginge
That was a long time ago. She needed the money.
I've seriously contemplated telling him the baby isn't his just so I can meet Maury Povich
I figured it out. hungover me hates drunk me, drunk me hates sober me, and sober me hates being sober. so yes, were blacking out tonight.
Did you bedazzle the elevator?
It was horrifying, i havent seen a girls mouth open that wide since that one episode of Goosebumps..
She can drink whiskey without a chaser and has a fridge full of whipped cream. Girlfriend potential
I'm going on a valentine's date with the random guy i hooked up with in the bar bathroom this weekend...i feel like julia roberts
We haven't said piping hot jizz in awhile... that needs to come back into our conversations
he looks SO much like Drake, I feel like an extreme groupie every time we have sex.
If I was gonna be at your campus for halloween weekend, I'd dress up as the masked horny fairy and give out condoms. I'm so thoughtful.
He had a joint rolled for us when he picked me up. It's how ASU does romance
Yes. I will keep putting the beer into my stomach and eventually the bartender will make a mistake
Turns out end of the world sex is H-O-T, HOoot! I'll be the only progressive lady smiling today
that moment you remember partying with someone several years ago.. and don't remember if you slept with them or not.
Randomize
