He told me I remind him of his sister...
Was this before or after you did it?
before... I mean, it's been a long time. I just tried not to think of it during.
I'm just looking at Lindsay Lohan's vagina.
Oh yea! I was just doing that too!
Everything was going good until she wanted to update her status...You forgot to close pterodactyl porn from this morning. Clothes went back on.
you know its a sad night when you can actually see and hear sitcoms on at the bar
Everytime I know she spent a lot of time on her hair for one of our dates, I intentionally cum on the top of her head. That's how she knows I pay attention.
did you know that if you have sex in the elevator on the way up that people can still get in?
The dumpster is full of naked people swimming. I'm going to join.
i can't believe you just compared my dick to leprosy
U should just post that picture of u two on facebook with the caption, does anyone know this girl? If so please tell her to take plan b, thanks
I dont care if your mom convinced you it should be an abstinent christmas. I did horribly on finals and i'm out of booze, so you will get over her and FUCK. ME. NOW.
I am the prescription. I can be taken orally or vaginally and in any dosage. This is why I went to med school.
It's 4/20 of course I'm going to smoke in the portapotty and be ripped outta my mind at the lung cancer walk.
He was my first. He knew. He knew right there I was wrapped around his penis.
I'm 10 cats away from completing my post divorce transformation.
My roommate just yelled at me for coughing. I'd like to yell at her for doing lines off our counter last night.
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