dude your cousin who was wearing the skirt wasn't wearing any underwear
gross she's a slut
yea she doesn't shave either
I couldn't get internet on my iPod in this hotel room for porn, so I made due with UFC.
I'm not sure what to say to that.
she told me that she was curious about how cum tasted. of course i left you.
Charging the asians next door to us $5 a page to print their final papers because theirs broke. Bars close in 2 hours, lets go
Are you dead or are you taking another 13 hour nap? you need to let me know these things ahead of time so i dont worry.
It's what America was founded on: former hookups referring you for a job four years later.
After you tried speaking to him in whale you asked if you could see his "blow hole." That's how bad it was.
Bullets don't scare me. I wish I was a coyote
Stop jerking off to vines my recommended list on YouTube is getting weird.
She's got Mike in the bathroom. He's covered in meat.
Serious question, on a scale of go for it to what the fuck are you thinking, what's me going to a monk or any religious official and saying "baptize me daddy" in a serious voice?
i'm drinking soco out of a mickey mouse cup right now. i love it when college and my childhood meet in the middle.
I'm drunk and he's still weird.
you ripped my door off of the hinges, kicked it in half and then proceeded to throw it down the stairs because i wouldn't make you a cheese burger
Sorry about kicking you last night but you don’t mess with a girls margarita bucket. Ever
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