He just said "I made some changes in my life. The male g-spot is in the rectum and I wanted to explore that."
She asked the class if starwars was based on a true story...
Honestly, it was easier to just put it in my mouth than to deal with an awkward conversation.
Got in a bar fight defending Prince. Thought you ought to know. He gets his dick sucked cooking eggs for breakfast.
First highlight of the semester: campus safety caught me peeing in the dirt parking lot by kappa. Then as they were about to write me up, they recognized me, laughed, and left.
I just asked her to come in through the window, this pretty much solidifies the whole fuck-buddy thing...
It's not ok to announce to a group of people playing beer pong that a girl put her finger in your butt last night. I now know this
took over 12 bombs tonight and we still aren't hooking up. Wait how am I functioning
Fingerblasting some girl on the deck tryna get her to fuck on a lifeboat
It was a "my chaser needed a chaser" kind of night
Played never have I ever with high schoolers today. Needless to say they brought up threesomes so I had to make a judgement call and decided to not put my finger down
I was mad at him...then I jerked off. Now I'm over it. Orgasms fix everything, I swear.
Are you drunk texting me again or are you just being your regular stupid self?
yes
I was told today that I'm the ugliest bartender in the area, so, I guess I have that going for me.
Apparently I was so drunk last night I got stuck in the revolving door at the hotel. They have suveliance vidoes of it.
Randomize
