I wish I could teleport
Dude I wish you were here. I'm innthe back seat and it looks like outer space and everything feels like rice. idk. wtf.
i wish that high-me and normal-me were two different ppl so that high-me could thank normal-me for setting out a feast before smoking
I wish that high-you wouldn't text me stupid shit at 3:30 in the morning
i was trying to find the best way to say come over and have sex, without saying it.
There are beer cans & oyster shells along the side of the road. I belong here
if you really don't think our country's going to shit think of this. Exactly one year from now I will either be in law school or teaching young, impressionable kids, maybe even yours. Try to sleep after that.
You're dating a nurse! That's smart, you never know when you'll have a medical emergency. Probably liver failure.
I didn't realize how trashy of a night we had.
Welllll, you did eat a cherry out of my pussy. So I think that classes it up a little.
Throwing up into Nora's potty chair while simultaneously having beer shits was truly the highlight of my Christmas season.
your were asleep with people making out on top of you. you didn't even look bothered by it.
I'm in the woods tripping balls the water is rising why don't you answer me
You need to finger her with the Spock hand sign since she loves Star Trek.
I also don't hate being called a giant sack of cheese. Is that weird?
i just want to get drunk and cry and have sex with lots of men
Is it wrong for me to wish my cat had arms to get me a beer?
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