He had one of those small greek statue penises
just had to re-breakup with her. it was like shooting a dead horse that was crying and talking.
She just did a bodyshot off herself. I don't care that it's only seven thirty, come pick her up.
my resolution for 2011 is to fuck him whenever he wants it. this year I'm going above and beyond the call of booty.
I managed to fit my wallet, my keys, my phone, Tammy's necklace, and $38.50 all in my bra. and $1.50 is in quarters. go me.
It's the first day of summer. It's not a race it's a marathon. Pace yourself
i jsut waqnnna hugg thw crap outa sokme peoplee
Come get her ASAP. She's "people bowling," which is just her rolling into random groups of people. People look pissed.
i formally give you permission to eat me when i pass out
Just successfully invited my mom to a drag show. If that doesnt say "im gay" then idk what will.
When you're not at your house I assumed you're somewhere having sex
Named all the presidents in order between puke sessions while semi conscious so that's a thing I can do now
Day one of being single and I've came three times. I can get used to this.
Just for future reference. Do not do zumba while stoned out of your mind.
Somebody put William Shatner singing Bohemian Rhapsody on the jukebox, and the whole bar is about to riot.
Randomize
