sooooo how many boyfriends is too many?
Sometimes when I see pregnant women, I wonder what position they were in when they got knocked up. Then I gag a little.
I may have discovered that porn hub is on my top visited sites during class this morning.
Pretty sure I can show you the text you sent me stating some interest in my penis entering your mouth if said circumstances were met.
I got a dollar bill stuffed into my bra on two separate occasions by two separate guys simply for having boobs. I feel like somewhere god is patting himself on te back while pointing at me goin "you're welcome dude." easiest two bucks I ever made.
I woke up to her screaming at the various pictures of nutsacks she found on her camera
idk. a stripper just bit me. I'm so disoriented
Remind me to tell you how I've been deaf since Sunday at 1245
He smells like cinnamon, and what I imagine to be orgasms
Overall a good night - broke my toe giving that cop a blowjob though...so there's that...
I'm trying to blow this guy down here can you please get my husband out of the house.
sober me thinks like you do. drunk me needs sober me's advice. am i allowed to go to his house?
As we were walking to her place she stole a pizza from the delivery guy's car and when we got home she grabbed a slice, two beers, removed her pants, and said "call of duty?" im going to marry her
Was I just dreaming, or was there a corpse at work last night?
She was just sleeping.
Is it bad that I'm kind of disappointed by that?
Just make sure you put pants on
....then im not going
Randomize