no but I have been chillin' like em' homeboys in the rainforest yo!
This girl is more easily done than said...
theres bread in your mailbox im going to eat it
nevermind its newpaper
Myspace is for pedophiles and tweakers in the 818 trying to hook up. I always forget theres music there too
if I see one grey pube I'm spitting his penis out!
let me put it this way. im never saying "join in or get out" again unless i know whos in the room.
Dude, sorry for live texting you my binge drinking. If you'd like me to do the same for my hangover, I can share that I just had to sit down while q-tipping my ears.
Hey, I took a sweater from your house. And, um, your little brother's virginity.
I told you when I started the only reason I was gonna coach your kids soccer team was that I could meet all the hot soccer moms. So why are you so mad I slept with your ex?
You said you brought chipotle into a movie and I asked you to marry me and you said yes
he cock-blocks himself, don't try to make excuses for him!
she asked me to come back to her house where "hopefully her kids were asleep". that my friend is what i call a dealbreaker
I need all the beers. I want to be holding on to the grass so I don't fall off the earth drunk.
I know. I know. He'll be weekday dick.
after that bj i gave him, i could fucking punch his mom and he wouldn't give a shit
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