Is masturbating to pics of your ex on Facebook considered cheating?
You are proof that most things are best left unsaid.
we'll go far in life on tits alone.
They are providing beer and having a margarita machine. This cannot be passed up.
One person in the car. Three blizzards. Alot of judging.
bikini waxes are so much more painful when you know you're not getting laid
You have no idea how much I'm praying for my moms side of the family's infertility right now
I just remember making out with this kid's friend, washing blood off my hands and hearing the RA's were looking for me.
No dude trust me, just go a strip club at their busiest hours and pick the ugliest chick. Guaranteed she blows you for under 20$, the record stands at $7.67 and a pen from Bank of America,
best. trip. ever. this is going to be too much fun. petland isnt going to know what hit them.
sick fucks of a feather flock together
they call him the transporter because he'll be your designated driver in exchange for sufficient weed or sex.\n
what about money
no - he has a code he lives by
I want Samuel L. Jackson to stand beside me and narrate my morning shits.
For the first time in my 26 years of life, I'm washing jizz out of my ponytail.... High five yourself later.
You would be proud of me, I did not take a dab at work today.
the universe is starting to freak me out.. ive now had sex with 3 people who were born on the same day..
Randomize
