I dont get it-she has sex with me but wont be my facebook friend?
I just want to hang out with her.
You're a liar. Why do I have to give you reasons you can't have sex with my mom? I hate you.
he farted when he came. not the best ending to my day.
Good cause the way I see it, we are down to DAYS left of college so we should have as much naked fun as possible. And Jenga really facilitates that.
i'm sorry, but my penis isnt the solution to your problems
Well I'm 2 for 2 with the absinthe, I just woke up in some random car behind the bar
Drunk Tina signed up to be part of the crew team and got a text from the captain telling her there's practice tomorrow. Wtf
Are we talking about who knows if I'll get naked pictures of you with a broadsword or who knows if I'll be surprised?
For sure shouldn't do homework after beers and joints. Just cited like 3 sentences at the end with (History, 2013)
If you're going to drink sriracha straight from the bottle whilst crying, at least wear the giant sombrero for the enjoyment of your audience.
I seriously want to say to him "Do you know how many blow jobs you could have gotten this summer?"
Got with someone dressed up as Allen from the hangover so that's where I'm at in life
Just remembered when I first started going down on him he goes "ok now I feel a little better about the broncos losing"
Pretty sure the delivery guy saw me taking a shit this morning
You rolled over grabbed my crotch and said "that's my waffle." I'm sleeping on the couch next time.
Randomize
