Remember that dream I told you about where I shit out my own skeleton? I had it again last night.
I'm pretty sure I'm almost gay. Like, I'd do it if I had no choice. Like, if i were in prison I'd try it.
You going to midnight mass? we need a dd
this whole healthcare thing got me thinking.. without knowing it my parents are now going to be paying for my dealer to be able to live..
There is a woman in the bar breastfeeding a baby. Doing shots. Gotta love maryland Applebees.
you were crying while pretty ricky was playing, what did you want me to do
about 90% sure I fell off a roof. It hurts BAD. Don't suppose you're still in town?
yup haha I infact DID fall off a roof. Want some bomb ass omlettes?
It was actually pretty good. His cock is as fat as the rest of him and I took out my contacts so I couldn't see him clearly.
I'm dressed in all sequins still at 9:30 in the morning and the worst part is that I actually still fit in in Vegas
I just talked this guy out of hooking up with me and gave him relationship advice. Am I a good person now?
So I'm sitting here baked on a bridge thinking about how plants think, I miss you so much
I made out with a girl because I wanted to get in the VIP section of the bar because they have these big comfy couches. It worked.
...Just hit my fuck buddy with my car.
Just got my LSAT score...if you need me I'll be drunk in a ditch somewhere.
My purse is full of condoms and money.
I like where this is going...
Randomize
