It was fun until I shot a pea out of my nose while throwing up. Left over tuna casarole at 3Am was a terrible choice.
I wouldn't really call it 'getting lucky' considering I paid her to do it.
dont get mad but guess who just got banned for life from dodger stadium
After we smoked, the cops questioned us but i just asked if he wanted to join our basketball team.
She gave me a rubber ducky to make me feel better while I was throwing up.
I found out what happened to that girls weave last night. It was draped over a bush in my backyard.
She brought a box of chocolates to give the bartender and now he's giving her free shots.. Why didn't we think of that?
future-me showed up mid trip and gave us a thumbs up.
Besides the flaccid incident, it was decent. Average sized. So this is my life now. Loneliness and lackluster sex.
just got home to find my brothers naked on the floor covered in chocolate. i am now nervous about sleeping in the same room as them
Well she got high, deleted the essay she was working on, and then ordered dominos. We all manage stress in different ways.
Getting your clit pierced is not something you want to trust to a crazy girl with an ice cube, some vodka, and a sewing needle. Trust me. I learned that the hard way.
all I'm saying is that my epic blow jobs have made grown professional football players cry in ecstasy
it was an ACCIDENT
it was a DICK
I called to inform you I may or may not be getting laid tonight ...
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