what are you wearing?
Just my guilt
I want to do you till i cant cum anymore. Till all i get is a little flag that says "bang".
I'm about to take my first shit since thursday. I'm scared. pray for me. If I don't make it, tell my family I love them.
I have started doing my homework in bars. It just feels right.
Okay, we really need to start training for the St Pattys parade. 48 hours of green beer won't end well if we don't prep ourselves. 2 week bender starts now
I really want to lead this Amish guy into temptation
I sincerely hope you find your fuck buddy and have a wonderful night of champagne and whores
I'm drawing the line at your vagina. I will not accompany you to get that pierced and/or tattooed. There's got to be some mystery to our relationship.
I mean.. listen to "Put It In My Mouth" and you'll get the gist of my voicemail for you.
I don't want my vagina anymore.
Turns out I tore my ACL when I fell off the mechanical bull.. Happy bday to me
I knew it was all downhill from there when the straight vodka I was drinking tasted like water.
I accidentally made jungle juice last night.
Now that I'm sober I feel the need to tell you that I'm not really a fish whisperer....
you don't need to worry about using proper grammar if you're asking for the size of his dick.
Randomize
