yup. cregs moms pubic hair is still glued to the celing
his mom and i are swapping prescript pills..totally mother in law material.
sometimes i wish i was a boob, they get to chill in soft and cuddly little cup things.
Been home for 3 days and already spiked coffee with Kahlua. Only 106 till we go back to school
he can show you his cooooock\nshining, shimmering, splendiddddd
you know what would be perfect? if you flew in on a horse/cat holding taco bell and then you swooped me up and took me to disney world and it was magical
So topless strobe light beer pong turned into me rugby tackling a bitch to the ground.my tits will never forgive me for sacrificing their majesticness for responsibility
You can wear my underwear. It'll be like old times.
Want a slice of this weekend's hottest piece of ass?
Can I join you for some emotional "Post: The Ohio State University's first lose in football after a 24 game winning streak" sex?
After we got done he told me to hold his penis because it helps him fall asleep
He added me on LinkedIn while I was baking weed brownies in the boxers he left here... Is this adulthood?
Operation terrify all men while simultaneously make them fall in love with me is going quite swimmingly so far
i woke up this morning wearing my pants as a scarf and my shirt as a daiper, my boyfriends contact name in my phone is "human sacrifice" and yours is "i like eggs"....can someone please tell me what happened last night
I use my feet as sexual weapons
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