If the pens lose tonight I'm gonna drive to Detroit and burn 8 mile to the ground.
Actually I may do that regardless. Probably get my own holiday.
i feel like the prize bull at the rodeo. everybody got a ride, no one lasted more than 8 seconds and i'm pretty sure i kicked one of them in the ball sack
i'll give you all the meat in my fridge in exchange for 2 condoms.
So I'm cool with the whole break up, but it sure is a shame we didn't get to use those handcuffs.
I swear to god he's a one man village people.
TOMORROW NIGHT CAN I HOLD YOU LIKE A BABY
It was almost awkward to look at you naked while listening to Circle of Life. Just saying.
We have 10 gallons of home brew. And james has an amazonian blow dart weapon that sticks in bags and the wall. Come over
Fuck these runners passing me on campus as I'm waking to dinner. With my huggie. With flavored vodka and rum. Aka yum
You suck at answering, but you did manage to avoid a fun conversation about hemorrhoids. So maybe you're great at answering.
After my lunch today, I've got $10 till Sunday night. I am losing at life.
If I die on my walk home, please come claim the body. There is $30 in my left shoe for you....for pizza
Once you find out someone has a small dick, you never look at them the same again.
Met this british guy. Played pool. Broke into an apartment and had sex
It feels like heartburn in my lungs. I'll buy 2 pounds.
Randomize
