so are u like ashamed lol?
not really. i dont look at it as being homeless. im just going to pretend im on an extended camping trip
After she threw up on my floor she started singing "this is why I'm hot."
yes he's amazing in bed. he made me like, black out. everything went black it was weird. so yes, i'd fuck him again. plus, he has every season of buffy on dvd
She said she's saving anal for marriage cuz she has to save something for her husband...seriously just caught myself lookin at rings.
We had to introduce ourselves in ethics class. This guy stood up said I'm mark, I love sluts and Jack. Then just sat back down. Hero status.
I'm pretty sure whiskey overrules bulimia in the eyes of Texas boys
Just promise me we won't die tonight. I can't have an autopsy report that reads "stomach contents: Tequila and semen."
My tuesday consisted of speaking to a federal agent for two hours and watching a roving band of gypsies jump over a fire until 2:30am
That moment when you see yourself in a security camera feed and realize you forgot a bra. And pants.
I'm not gonna lie. The thing I miss the most about him right now is the air conditioned hotel rooms.
high moment I think I just reached personal nirvana
My vagina has a heartbeat. That means I'm in love, right?
If only I could bank my drunk hookups for a sober IOU.
Beyoncé wouldn't let anything bad happen here
Next time I pee on a car, I'll text you.
Randomize
