I googled Canada's legal age of consent. I have good news. It's 14. Justin Bieber here I come...
i can't find my house
we droppd you off right in front! i even walked you to the steps less then 3 mins ago.
i'm pretty sure my house moved.
Jameson and I invented street rugby last night. Yeah
It was like an ecstasy filled massage for my vagina.
That's the best compliment I have ever received.
So what exactly does one do when my driver gets a DUI and is now arrested and I'm still hiding in the trunk?
Also, just woke up in a Romney tank and sequin flag panties. Merica.
The day i have a fb album titled " I have become a townie" you can shoot me in the foot and tell me to get my life together
you were caressing the jar of pickles then you looked down and whispered to them "I want you inside me"
I have found random beers stashed in my purse and microwave... Apparently I thought 2015 was gonna have a beer shortage
To this day, I regret not having sex in the bathroom
Girls - I think I have a problem with stealing random shit when I'm drunk.
I've got a tequila scented hand sanitizer for you.
you're the best roommate i could ever have.
Access to a Target is paramount to my general happiness and self-worth.
Fuck. I think I can already feel tomorrow's hangover. It's like future me cane back to warn present me about the impending doom but didn't turn the time dial back far enough.
If by science you mean beer then YES!!!!
Randomize
