White coat. Heels.
Just mixed Baileys and yoohoo. I feel like an alchoholic 2nd grader.
the only bad part about drinking alone is that in the morning there's nobody who can tell you what you did
You weren't a difficult drunk to take care of. I just had to stop you from plunging the toilet once or twice.
It smells like someone died in our apartment and ya'll used some random orifice of his body to smoke weed out of. Side note, how did we get a guitar?
I'm that hungover student in class ... On a wednesday morning
Omg I think I'm in the wrong class
We've been here for ten minutes. She told me I wasn't "Irish enough", licked my tits, and then sprinkled green glitter on them.
. Drop what your doing. Were going to Knoxville for midget wrestling. It's the championship.we can NOT miss this.
From now on I forbid you to refer to it as a "bed". From now on you must only use the phrase "sex wagon".
The most humiliating part was that I farted while he was tasing me.
Sobered up midsex and just went with it. After he tried cuddling and I awkwardly rolled out of the bed to find someone on the floor, apparently it was his room so he got to listen.
It makes me feel all patriotic & free... And borderline diabetic.
You took all of your clothes off and tried to seduce me and while trying to seduce me you decided you were too drunk and passed out.
what happened last night?
we watched you eat an entire bag of dorritos in the pouring rain... you refused to come inside
My life. Always pantsless and occasionally topless.
Randomize
