Nothing gets me like the O.C. theme song does.
so how much must it suck for him to know that the penis of his best man has been in his wife's mouth before?
Who wants to bang the sort of girl you can get with Axe body spray??
If Bret Micheals dies..will VH1 have to go off the air?
you drew a penis with ranch dressing. tried to take a picture of it and dropped your phone in it. Then made moaning sounds while you licked it off.
I am trying to think of a way to make alcohol cupcakes
Listen, everyone has a price and mine is free taco bell.
I called her 20 times. Apparently she went home to do MORE shots before bed. Didnt miss me until this morning. WHO FORGETS THEIR HIGHSCHOOL SISTER AT A FRAT?
We literally just Chinese fire drilled so I could give him road head.
This is the Taco Bell dump we've all been waiting for.
Beer, water, beer, water, beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer so much beer
Just remember that I named his dick Robo-cock before he got into the sheriff's department.
There's so much mac and cheese stuck to my foot right now
Who died my cat blue again?
I feel like I should have held a press conference. The state of my vagina
Randomize
