I like to think it a success when the cops are called
I found the seven page love letter I had written you. I'm sorry i was so obsessed.
And she was only 16?
You say that like it's a bad thing.
That glade motion activator thing keeps going off every time we pass the bong. I don't know what I'm getting high off right now.
Someone just took a shot from my crotch. I should not have to drive home
Is it wrong i wouldn't sleep with him because his boxers said #1 dad all over them?
Sorry for pissing on y'all's floor last night
Senior week was like trying to herd cats. Very drunk cats.
WAKE THE EFF UP THE UBER DRIVER IS TRYING TO TAKE ME HOME
She is dumping me if she doesn't get a ring by Valentines. So one more month of free sex and it will be back to the right hand.
I will read books by day and do guys by night. A mental and physical enlightenment, if you will.
So we are in the middle of sex and his brother knocks on the door and says "dude I just wanted to know if you want to see the fish I got tonight"
Thank you for stroking my rage monster tonight.
I don't think Buddha would recommend a sexscpade across Mexico
its a recording of you guys having sex?!
its actually 30 minutes of him begging and then 2 minutes of sex.
Randomize
