We were chasing that deer in the quad and next thing I remember I woke up in my RAs bed. I'm probably in trouble.
Nicole vs. Life
Just bummed a recreational vicodin off my friend's 40 year old boyfriend & am hoovering a breakfast sammy from costco. And I don't have a boyfriend because why?
she used her cellphone as a light to find my clit under the sheets. worst.lesbian.ever.
Sorry I forced you to take an adderall at 1am and then proceeded to dance to Lose Yourself outside of Qdoba.
as of this morning I have officially vommed on the highways of 6 different countries. It's a proud moment.
Well, I want to see you regardless of whether or not you will lick whipped cream off my body.
I just made the answer to all my security questions "fuck you" with various levels of ! marks. I may regret this in the morning.
No, no. The rest of his everything inspires me to put his dick in my mouth
I think I need a restraining order. I had 15 "selfies" of him on my camera roll......my phone has a lock code on it.
This power is too much for most humans to handle safely. It's like having the nuclear launch codes, except it's my penis.
I'm pretty sure our sex is better than most foods and that says a lot too bc I really like food
It's shark week go big or go home
My saturday night consisted of sewing my Halloween costume and watching Blues Clues
You actually...sewed your costume?
You call it sex. I call it penis conditioning.
Randomize