he wants to bone in the snuggie
Just remembered I told my boss that matt used to make me toss his salad like every time we hooked up. Nice
Ok. Cause im very serious about this. I wanna strip and do coke for a month
I'm making celebratory pizza rolls. They're a lot like regular pizza rolls, but without the taste of shame.
what's not responsible about a pool full of beer?
I walking on her passed out on her bed, clutching a burrito and the walking dead dvd on replay.
I watched her follow him out of the bar, chase him around the corner and literally throat punch him. It was awesome.
Just had a talk about safe sex with my mom. Not about protection. About the very real possibility of a "penile fracture". Gotta love having a nurse for a mother.
Caleb has a beard comb now. Also I have a pube comb now too. May or may not be related incidents
I spent the money she owed me on enough magnum condoms to make a blimp. Damn right I'm going to make the best of it.
Well I was thinking of taking him out for drinks then lecturing him about his drinking... kind of like an open minded intervention
Sex obviously provides more sustenance than oatmeal.
I wish you could just Google "people I've had sex with" and they would all just come up
Anyone would get lost in that field after that much vodka. Trust me... I kind of feel like superman considering I even made it home. Most people would've been face down in a random oilfield. Not this guy.
He chose me to be his birthday sex..theres a lot of pressure riding on this bang
Randomize
