butt sex is not good for yourself don't do it
Thanks?
u know ur in oregon when the cop tells u to keep the beer cans he made u pour out so u can recycle them
I thought Christmas was going to come before I did
you're like the Neil Armstrong of terrible hookups, you are a pioneer
You kept trying to hail an ambulance
She called me in the morning crying, but I was busy cleaning up bird guts, very hungover. It was a very surreal morning.
She sent me a map and directions for a booty call. In a park. Give me reason not to marry her.
I get so many dick pics from him...He has an unhealthy obsession with his own penis...
I admit it could have gone better but look at it this way, since I broke the urn you don't have to worry about spreading the ashes.
he accidentally put it in my ass, i liked it but didn't tell him that and "accidentally" took his weed.
He took me out to dinner to tell me we had to stop fucking so randomly
Honestly wish he pleased me as much as queso does
whered you go
woke up in a ditch, shat infront of a little league game, slept in her stairway...i need to come here more often
I just remembered how you stole the slinky from me. Bitch, I will NEVER forgive you.
I got confused. The music was loud, porn was playing, people were grinding, there were hand jobs.
No. It's going to be "I'm mad that it took you so long to get over here" angry sex.
Randomize
