i've alrwady decidided boys hate me plkease take notyes.
what
nvm
if i get an abortion, then will you go out with me?
i thought i was pinching her nipple. It was her mole
i wish semen tasted like chocolate
being a part time student has turned me into a full time alcoholic.
I found out why we traded puke covered dresses in the bathroom.
I think i can make this amish girl legitimately hot.
One blow job doesn not make me gay.
I wiped my blood on their walls screaming "IT'S NOT MY SECURITY DEPOSIT!"
He's like a perfect storm of amazing hair and horrible judgment.
I've officially done it all, fucked a girl wearing a twister board. ABC parties are amazing!
I let a drunk, gay man in a dragon costume motor-boat me. With his dragon head.
I will be single by the day my lease is up (234 days). Plan accordingly.
He also deemed that the fact that I couldn't log into Netflix was not an emergency. He's wrong.
He was like the most intimidating looking guy you've seen in your life except he was really shittily doing the two step
Randomize
