I have said "that's the wrong hole" for the last time.
I just banged your sister. Thats what you get for takibg my lunch money in 2 grade, boom, boom fiyyaa powaa
if you had such a terrible roommate you would understand. jacking off in his conditioner is just the start.
her vagina just converted me to Judaism.
you ate the make a wish sign. Like actually chewed on it. It was our solution to going outside when the cops were there
The look on the dr's face when she asked me the last time i had sex and i responded "like an hour and a half ago" ... priceless
Feel better punkin. Your balls will be gently resting on my forehead in no time
Nope I went the fuck home like an adult
Just go read my twitter... There's a play by play. It starts with a penis pump
I'll have to start mass sending dong pics to get the recognition I deserve
After the first time we had sex he kept saying "I'm proud of you" over and over again
THIS THING HATES MY LIVER
I had to join a gym to keep up with this 22 yr old
He ran out to tell us that somebody flooded the bathroom, then went back in there fell on his ass and asked why the floor was wet
So bottomless mimosas = me waking up in a truck bed in a random neighborhood with no purse or phone or idea how I got there.
Randomize
