Iced coffee. Banana. Two dumps. Life is good.
Watching this movie and saying "drink every time you see an animal" was a bad idea...circle of life...holy crap
When we ran out of red solo cups we switched to Starbucks cups for beer pong... Who doesn't want to live in Seattle?
wow, so sex, not that great its like masturbating with a warm towelette, like the kind you get at a japanese restaurant
Who has a video camera? i want to look back on this one day and say OH thats why i spent 2 years in jail
He just gave himself a boner while driving using "the power of his mind"
i think you may have a shot to cock block in a moment. just saying.
Wake up an cock block please bc these are noises i dont ever want to hear again
PS my house is a mess.
pps I have a rash on my face.
Sleeping in a car was not on my list of plans for the night.
Yes but funny for a 45 year old hell bent on reliving her college days by giving body shots and hand jobs. Not necessarily in that order
I consider any night I don't make out with someone a bad night. So I've been great.
this old dude from the bar is giving me a ride home in a van, his bumper sticker says " don't laugh your kids could be in here" scary world ou here
you ever just feel like an organ is failing?
Oh shit. My bra is undone and I'm pretty sure I peed on my sandal
Actually I really wish that I was drinking so I could ask him for breakup sex and then later blame it on my alcoholic tendencies. Maybe tomorrow instead.
Randomize
