Idk. We dropped acid and Kevin ran away again. We didn't find him for like 3 hours.
Man I wish I had been there
Yah we found him in the pool shed of some elderly couple. They were on the porch watching all of the shenanigans. ...To be young again.
she added me on facebook and her celebrity doppelganger is rosie odonnel. FUCK
I could literally track my booty calls if I ever got knocked up by my parking tickets
my dad just referred to me and my boobs as 'the three of you'
found my necklace. it was safe with all 6 boxes of peeps that i bought that night.
Burnt my ear trying to use the bathroom blow dryer as a telephone.
RA chick in a Christmas onsie chased us up 5 flights of stairs. I need to stop violating guest policy
you came out with your cock in between the legs of a balloon animal. Maybe she'll think you have a sense of humor.
What kind of balloon animal was it?
You would be my first round pick for a drinking team
You gave your boss a bj to get the safe employee of the month award?
my cat just photo bombed my nudie.. does this qualify me as a cat lady?
My coworker's brand new computer showed up today. He's on vacation for the next week. Brian and I are installing Windows 98 on it.
We knew it was an interesting night when we found my thong wrapped around a chocolate chip muffin in the fridge.
BUT YOU GOTTA TASTE THE RAINBOW!!
That's what Skittles are for!
Don’t drink the Bloody Mary - it’s vodka and salsa.
Randomize