He had some BAD nuttage
Nuttage?
It's like cleavage......... but different
Banned from zoo.
Again?
Sorry I couldn't get my dick out
The second he texted me with "*dry humps you!*" I knew any relationship we might have had was over.
when she said she's going upstairs to put her "play clothes" on, I knew either she was a pervert or a kindergarten teacher. Either way, I wasn't going to leave. She's a pervert by the way.
He said he forgot to take his shoes off, and that he was a bad boy because he was walking on the carpet. Then he sang. Then he shouted "I'M STILL FORGETTING."
The main two things I remember from last night is you "spanking Katey into reality" and watching her barf in terror.
She straight up told me, "I don't care if he films as long as he's quiet." You sure you can't find the camera?
He returned my car yesterday. Found a duffel bag with beef jerky, condoms, and a handgun this morning. Slightly concerned
How's my date look?
Like a retarded elf
In a good way
I currently need breakfast in bed, morning sex, and a bourbon and diet coke. Make this happen
To confirm, you are a grown ass man and you just asked me what her vag looked like.
I kinda got drunk and threw my debit card into a bonfire so I don't have any money at the moment lol.
My poor liver. I drank enough on NYE to sustain an alcohol addiction for the entirety of 2015.
All I could think about while we were fucking was what Hogwarts house he would be in
Randomize
