i cvme to yuor rooom...wherer are youf?
please be gone before i get back
I haven't been able to trust a girl since spanks came out
it was really awkward, he kept trying to get on the bed with us and we kept having to kick him back on the floor.
she went home with me because she said i reminded her of paul rudd. remind me to thank him for his awkwardness
we found him in the shower with a bottle of jose saying "this is Mexico's fault"
there was this guy running across campus barefoot in the pouring rain stepping in all the puddles. i want his life. and i want to be stripper.
I don't know what it is about vodka that make me ruin relationships.
I just found a 2 minute video on my phone of you throwing up in a fake plant.
Just make sure my intervention has a theme...
Just don't eat pie out of the sink. It's a real blow to the self esteem.
I feel like I have to sign a death waver before I have sex with him...
On my way to get pizza I followed a dog into Salvation Army where I was just hired
I'm pretty sure I imagined the dog... They still hired me
We both knew it was over when I took a u turn at her belly button.
I think someone shaved off all their pubes in the handicap stall or a werewolf stopped by the office to take a crAzy dump!
His penis is average but his stamina is amazing!!! I didn’t know I had that many orgasms in my body!!!!
Randomize
