what's Bukake?
a bad idea.
He's still on the phone with him. This is unnatural. Dudes don't call other dudes just to talk.
I just saw the preacher from the church I grew up in while I was buying condoms at the drugstore... he remembered me.
He did a line, told me my hair looked pretty against the background of the clouds, and then we fucked. Good afternoon
Unintentionally made him cum in his own mouth, and he just sat there screaming..
I woke him up this morning and said I have a meeting w my advisor in an hour you need to wake up, cum on my face, and take me to my car.
some guy just burried his vomit in the sand.
There's cereal in my underwear. Was I in your apartment at any time last night? That's the only logical explanation for this.
So we came to a decision, you need to fuck your hot roommate and send us pictures. We voted, so don't hate the democracy this great country stands for
Dude I'm at a bar, and there's this Elvis impersonator here that I went to rehab with. Apparently Elvis has left the wagon.
I just threw up 34 cents. What in god's name did we do last night?
apparently they stopped looking at spit swabs under the microscope in bio ever since they found a sperm cell in one students sample
I know the wedding is going to be a good time, I don't have to wear a bra with my dress
The man built me a fort. Of course he got laid.
Ladies night is a gift from god. If it weren't for that, I'd probably be selling my eggs for booze money.
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