is it bad that I only want to go to my boyfriends house bc I want to see his roomate walk around with his shirt off?
I just looked at my iPhone gps history... "the gas station", "the park with a big scary fence", "the trampoline", and, my favorite, "where we were when we were about to do lines off a bible".
just heard someone say they saw a guy puke while riding a bike across campus without stopping
I hate the hobo that sits outside our building
Joe or Chris?
do i even wanna kno y u kno their names?
well i came home drunk one night and Chris offered me a beer as i was coming in, it was kinda weird but i wasn't goin to deny a free beer. you're proolly talkin about Joe though, he's the one with the fucked up eye.
i can't remember the last friday i didn't spend in the foetal position
21st Birthday Idea: liquor store gift registry. Give me a promotion.
Living room yoga. I'm too hungover to deal with anyone else's chi today.
Druken naked yoga : jus another ploy to keep your husbands eye in check
Have the decency to NOT HANG YOU'RE USED CONDOM ON THE FOOSEBALL HANDLES! Dickhead.
So I stappled myself into my toga... that should be interesting getting out of later tonight...
Oh it's not a problem. Cleaning up the yard and disposing of 75 gallons of Jello is all I've got to look forward to today.
I just masterbated to the Lets Get Ready To Rumble theme
So my ex vomited in front of my door and passed out there
Am I under any obligation to let my new fuck buddy know I slept with his little sister?
meow
use your words like a big girl
i ran over your cat.
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