This is some kinda fucked up sordid doggy brothel peepshow bullshit.
There is no way he is gay with that hair.
You know its bad when you're praying for a hangover just so you aren't still drunk at work anymore.
A relator touring our house this week saw the picture in our bathroom of steven passed out, yellow faced, with BALLS on his forehead, and had to ask "if that kid was alive or dead".
through my window right now you can see the hot chick next door is standing BUTT ASS NAKED eating peanut butter off a knife.
ill be there in 5.
he got promoted. that means i have now given my new boss chlaymida. i need a new job.
Housekeeping called in a homicide detective. Just spent an hour explaining that we had vigorous hotel vacation sex five times, even though I was having a heavy flow day. It'll definitely be what you call a memorable honeymoon.
I left you pizza on the porch. I didn't want to wake you, if you were passed out on the bathroom floor again. Sorry if it's cold.
He will not just "come" out of the closet. He will fall out, 69ing me, with two fingers in his starving asshole, wearing cum splattered lady gaga sunglasses, weeping.
That was the greatest thing i have ever read.
I'm just gonna plan on never getting a bf. everything I touch turns to gay
I'm posted up in the bathroom at au bon pain, high as balls, experimenting with eyeshadow combinations and listening to 90s jlo. The girl in the stall next to me just plopped a big one and I laughed, hope I ruined her day
I found a pair a guys underwear in my purse that has a British flag on it and says and I quote "British beef" what.the.fuck.
returning from a 6am booty call in 2 feet of snow on a Tuesday is a bold new kind of low for me
Tomorrow we start training our livers for St.Patrick's day. May God be with us.
Why the fuck are you playing with legos?
Why the fuck are you questioning me?
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