I wanna come home
And do what?
Kiss. Rip clothes off. Repeat.
He said he was from Mississippi and my vagina clamped shut like a frightened oyster
he was so excited that he found the elusive clitoris. i was like look christopher colombus, just because you found it doesnt mean you knew what to do with it
Now accepting hypotheses about how i managed to get a bruise between my boobs....
Miller High Life will be the death of me. Well, that and shower sex.
I remember nothing of last night, but I did manage to figure out which frats I went to by the trails of straw across campus.
Are you having sex right now? Or is the apt just swaying rhythmically on its own? Either way, awesome.
i feel we're the only people who'd use nyquil sexually
Just did it in a room with glowing stars to Peter Gabriel's down to earth on shrooms. This is like god
You're lucky you got out when you did, about an hour later the girl in the Franzia box started wrestling everyone.
Why let a Christmas Eve hangover ruin a perfectly good Christmas Day acid trip?
I'm just going to take a nap and hope I wake up more attractive.
I think I should've done my makeup before I took the acid. Because now I just feel silly looking at myself in the mirror
Did April legit get married in a parking lot?
Tell her that we understand the angle wasn't the best on the first video and that we forgive her.
Randomize
