look mate, i'm pretty sure 14 texts saying "fuck me. fuck me now" more than passes the legal benchmark for consent.
hey, when you wake up, search yourself on youtube
my sister already found it, were watching it right now. i give it 2 thumbs up.
Just found out Brianna Frost the Pornstar goes to my school. Makes that $35,000 tuition that more valuable.
I just puked while everyone was releasing balloons. Im to hungover for this memoial service. Rest in peace great gramps.
i feel like his penis is a security blanet. i cant fall asleep unless its in my hand
I met the perfect girl for you, she's smart, likes cars, has at least one ear, and really blue eyes!
please elaborate on, "atleast one ear"
I walked downstairs and he was standing in nothing but his boxers with his dick hanging out warming up eggs in the microwave.
It's just a condom. Most people would commend me for saying I was going to start using them, and you're acting like I'm going to try heroin.
well the hot one passed out so thats that, but then the fat one made chicken nuggets....totally worth it
dizzyuy bat. 3.453 lkos. hoit sx, now im single. blackouteed
He came, while we were making out fully clothed. I'm going to write a book.
Food poisoning on first date... Still rode the mechanical bull like a champ
It's like... Even my horoscope knows I had an awkward threesome last night.
I don't know what's worse the fact that I woke up with a clit piercing or the fact that I didn't pay for it.
It must be love. I'm deleting my porn for him.
Randomize
