i gave her road head last night, needless to say it wasn't the same and i bit a chunk of the inside of my cheek off.
so. which one of us is going to pay for the neighbors new window? it cracked when i threw the bottle at it but smashed when you threw yours.
The bouncer said he wanted to but BBQ sauce on my legs. That Mystic tan has already paid for itself.
12 trash cans filled with water. Beer cans floating in each, 12 ft apart. Dodgeball. Ultimate beer pong.
Rules. We have to wear superhero outfits
I woke up with flowers, a tiara & pasta salad in my bed. Tequila makes me act like a fat Disney princess
I'm stealing this baby.
Well I always support illegal activity but where would you put it?
I was scared that I should know him but I was too busy blacking out to remember
Please tell me how I go from a guy with a coke problem to a cop. My own life doesn't even make sense to me anymore
I love this text stream: discussing the development of a business model centered around cooking acid to bankroll a yacht trip in Croatia
At 38 I had to open a Snapchat account to communicate with my 21 yr bf. where is my life going.
I forgot wine drunk hurts
I told him I was studying his body for art, so now I have to actually do a drawing of him to not look like a creep and so we can hook up again.
Jungle juice breakfast? No? Ok.
Youre saying I should leave him? Have you seen the dating pool these days? It's terrifying, and in the capital region it's straight Norman Bates
I watched one of the videos of you hanging from the rafters, and it is both violent and sexual in nature.
Randomize