He keeps apologizing for not being able to get hard when he's drunk. We havent even left the club yet.
I love that we get drink and call each other crying. It's kind of our thing.
Could you please tell them to stop whispering "thundercunt" every time I walk in the room?
she walked in on me snorting my prozac. there was no way to convince her i was doing a good thing.
It's a special occasion. Hence the 151.
I feel like letting the same guy who shot him dig the pellet out of his leg with a pocket knife was the bigger mistake
Pretty sure encouraging you to sleep with 2 different girls while keeping you in the good graces of both has lost me the ability to call myself a woman. But that's just the kind of friend I am; dedicated.
Random pof guy just messaged me initiating a Pokemon battle. Want to be a bridesmaid?
I'm debating a nap but also debating breaking into the liquor cabinet
Im going to the gym...covered in the Brazilians cum
And how is that different than any other weeknight in your world
i woke up and couldnt remember who was in my bed and it was so dark.. i rolled over and started kissing him and feeling his face because hey... if the blind can see like that.. maybe i could too
Booze, boobs, blunts and batman. dude, I'm livin' the life.
im ready to get drunk and forget everything ive learned this semester
If you think me talking about that hot guy accepting my LinkedIn request is pornographic, I’m not sure how you’re gonna feel when I tell you I fucked a stranger on a park bench last weekend
My vagina! What have you done to it?
Blessed it my child.
Randomize
