it actually wasnt that awkward...i planned on saying hello and walking away..then she asked if i wanted to go to lunch and i looked at her chest and said absolutely
I did that thing again where I get way too drunk and go gay. Then wake up in the morning and freak out at the person. Yet another bar I cannot go back to
even in my darkest moments, having another person eat my jizz would make me smile
Ive given up on my natural charms. Im trying different accents till some girl wants to hook up with me.
Did she have bad breath? Bad breath makes you think of all the bad things in the world
we did rock-paper-scissors to see who would find out if you had alcohol poisoning
You weren't just peeing. You were like grinding on it. And you tried to pee in the washing machine first.
yes, i was eatting raw cookie dough and fingering myself at the same time.... is there a problem?
Please root for the ravens. I now have oral sex riding on this and it's been sooooo long
Dude, for twins they have shockingly different blowjob styles.
STOP FUCKING MY SISTERS!!!!
There are two guys's cum on my sheets. Be a man and be the third.
I feel like we have a good system here turning our sketchy decisions into great stories.
Today's psa: there are certain parts of your body you shouldn't scratch while wearing fake nails.
you just tore your cootch a new one, didn't you?
he's so sweet and its so cute. but I swear to fuck if I let my guard down and this was all a lie I am going to become a serial killer.
Chicks dig it when you smell like bong water and frebreeze.
Randomize
