Anal astronaut?
Wow word travels fast.
I have to start avoiding pregnant women. This is getting out of hand.
Mines from giving head on hardwood floors.
its like my vagina has this homing beacon out to all the guys saying "come find me, i havent been shaved in weeks"
u think ur still drunk from last night? i just put the eggs in the freezer and the remote in the sink. I don't wanna fucking hear it.
Haha he acted like he's never seen a tampon catapolt across the hall before
Semi hypothetical question. Do you think its physically possible to bruise your clit?
You coming out tonight? We gotta hang out before I move to Madison. BTW I'm moving to Madison.
The only reason we got away with streaking last time was cuz we had those miner hats
GOOD NIGHT DREAM OF ALCOHOL SNO CONES
Do you think the neighbors will know I was the one giving out the penis shaped lollipops to the children?
I wrote my name on his balls in sharpie. In the homosexual world that's like a diamond ring. Shits permanent.
I'm warming McDonald's pies on my heater cause I'm too high for the microwave.
I am in the parking lot of CVS in Auburn. I think a truck full of Plan B and regret just arrived.
I just got fed by 3 guys. I love my job.
Randomize
