let's have our labels/stereotypes/careers for each kid by next week.
oh how i love working at summer camp.
Maybe if you date her you can take a dump on her
He drunk dialed T-Mobile at 3am and talked to them for 45 minutes and got his phone bill lowered from $80 to $60... Best drunk dial ever.
once you get past the part where you think youre gonna die, its the most amazing drug ive ever experienced.
Doctorate. Vaginahole. Cinnamon. Rainbow. Fill in the blanks in the morning.
Wedding cake is always the best dance partner. In the corner. With a jack and coke. And while I'm crying. Listening to "Almost Paradise".
I'm still tasting pancake mix. I think this may actually be a serious medical problem...
I was in the library and saw 2 dudes hackysacking in a study room with 3 girls working. I asked if I could join; as soon as I closed the door the chicks offered me tequila shots. study session w/everyone cancelled, I'm busy.
Last night I went to spank her while she was riding me and sack-tapped myself.
Time to eat Mexican food til I hate myself.
That's completely alright, I do it a lot.
I have a boner in one of my pics with her which no one noticed.
I'm standing on the corner in a banana costume and cape with frozen bananas in my utility belt reassessing my life decisions.
Not sure how my purse ended up in the bushes last night... Or why there was a noodle strainer in the toilet.
You ran outside of the party to do the rain dance and swim in puddles
Of course he did! You’ve seen my tits, you know he didn’t stand a chance!
Randomize
