This girls' body was nothing short of spectacular...her face, was like the '09 Detroit Lions
he said "cool" when i took off my bra and proceeded to stare wideeyed at them the ENTIRE time. it was like sleeping with the kid i showed my boobs to for the first time in 6th grade.
if that dog is afraid of alcohol then he's no dog of mine
If only guys knew how much awkward ass shaving goes into making sex this good...
Apparently it costs $70 to clean vomit off the side of our apartment building.
Jerry just sent me this: IOR GHIT ALL THE BUTTIB. Go get him. Now.
I just called my mom 'Napoleon bronaparte'. I need to stop hanging out with you.
yeah i didn't know anyone, but i just walked in with a lit sparkler and wearing a budweiser shirt and someone handed me a beer.
John stretched a condom over his face and tried to puke in it.
Tip of the day: Don't ever send a bootycxall at 3 in aftnoon. No one will respond n u'll just feel fooolish.
My suggestion is that you just get high and set shit on fire
NATIONAL GIVE A BOSTON COP A BLOW JOB BITCH ROAD TRIP NOW
Is it bad that I recognize every dick in your dic pic collection?
It looks like you got dick slapped by the sandman..
I am downtown smoking a joint with Woody Harrelson...Because our car won't start. I will be there as soon as I can.
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