Yeah true. Damn vaginas. They're ruining the world.
"women exchanges sex for chips" on msnbc
damn even the hoes are getting hit by this economy
I just took boredom to a whole new level. I just auto-tuned and remixed today's western civ lecture
judging by the mobile uploads you added of me last night, we cant keep living this way.
Oh god the guy I took underwear from at the bar is trying to add me as a friend on facebook now.
He stole all of his parent's vodka WHILE they were in the room, and then opened the window and snuck out. I was watching from my truck
He's short and fat and honestly I think he's what my self esteem was made for
My boobs looked so good under the black light I saw a girl physically cover her boyfriend's eyes.
Hooked up with a guy that looked like Dean Thomas. Mediocre at best, but I stopped myself from calling him Dean in bed. So I got that going for me.
You left a bit of molly on the table and my mom found it. She asked what it was, I said "not drugs"
She believed me because "leaving that much behind on the table would be a waste so obviously it's not drugs."
I was wondering why are people staring at me til I realized I was bra-less with a lei around my neck
She has a bong hits for Jesus shirt. Of course I'm going to like her.
I hummed the theme from jaws while she was taking the pregnancy test....needless to say she was not pleased
color coded lube a great way to organize my bootie calls
Is there any reason why a taxidermic donkey head is in the shower?
Randomize
