When you're about to leave, tell him "bye." At that point, he should say something. If he doesn't say anything, well, our drinks were free and he gets a free make out with yours truly.
Does the whole "it was New Years" excuse apply this year?
i'll get you drunk even if i have to inject alcohol into your arm through an IV
you're the only one i would trust to do that
I got laughed at by a homeless guy in a Daniel Boone hat. I have no clue what this means for my day
Yeah her jello shots are the next closest thing to a lethal injection. That potent.
My life is over. I farted in open court. Noticeably. The judge looked at me. It echoed.
I'm just so happy. I go to sleep and when I wake up there will be chocolate milk and penis.
my memory may be fuzzy, but the 20+ naked pictures I sent him were surprising clear
No it'll be my boobs and the luge part will be from my nipples. Everyone will be sucking beer from my perfectly sculpted and partially melted tits.
Gotta get dat. Gotta get dat. Gotta get dat dat dat dat dat ~uterus contraction~
If you sleep with him again I'll have you spayed
If you end up wanting to sit on his face, just make a sound like a dying giraffe and I'll make myself scarce.
There's a stripper getting there at 10 though so hopefully I'm out before the stripper gets there. I don't have time to deal with a stripper.
Xanax and full house Tuesday is now Percocet Sunday
Dude we were sitting at my place stoned as fuk then someone knocks on the door and it was my neighbor giving me a huge box of cookie dough. Magic of weed.
Randomize
