From inside my college history class i see him waving his arms while holding a beer bong trying to get my attention
I managed to throw up 90 feet under water, just removed my breathing tube, puked, put it back in. All inclusive is the way to go.
I just found three unopened cans of PBR behind our futon that I think I was saving for winter.
i got really high and listened to the spongebob squarepants theme song and, i swear to god, it was in german.
All I remember was the chick screaming "don't hookup with him! His dick's the size of a cucumber"
My cousin's dog just exhaled smoke. My job here is done.
we just plugged the camera up to the big screen. would you like to come see what you did last night, in high definition?
stumbled upon a picture of an owl staring me in the face. i almost offered him a bong hit.
hes out at the street wearing a tophat and a monocole and carrying a cane and greeting every car that drives by
he just went across the street and into someones house and we could hear him inviting them over from the front porch
Some guy dressed like Santa just handed me a bottle of tequila. I NEVER WANT TO LEAVE CANCUN
You know how most people would take your keys when they don't want you to leave a party? Those 2 girls aren't most people. They took my pants instead.
omg this is getting ridiculous. nobody's vagina should ever be this neglected.
I didn't want him to hear me sneaking in. The doggie door was the perfect solution.
Anytime he goes down on me i automatically think of you cheering me on. Your a good friend.
so do you remember taking your shirt off and just standing in your bra at the bar or no?
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