if you come down to my room ill tell you a secret
It was the first time I had seen his penis when it wasnt hard. It just looked so vulnerable and a little bit depressed.
I don't think so, think I've only met him once, the night I lost my teeth
85% positive I just found a hair of a certain variety wayyy in the back of my mouth between two teeth while flossing.
She ended up puking in the bathroom. But she's a good drunk... i told her to stay in there so i could dance til the club closed. She was still in the stall an hour later.
I don't think boys are aware how difficult it is to take a picture of your own ass.
Is it possibile to sprain your taint?
She was that bad?
I think I met somebody from your birthday this past weekend. He said I held a push up contest outside the bar and told them I would make out with the winner. He said he won..
I need you to know that everytime my toddler does the downward facing dog in the nude I think about the night you and your dude fell in love.
my mom snuck into my room, washed her clothes and made her breakfast. what the fuck she's a better boyfriend than I am
but I'm still not sure how you became more and more fluent in Spanish the drunker you got
He said my vagina is harder to escape than the Temple of Doom.
I'm so high right now that I winked back at a character in this TV show.
We stood outside the room listening to them have sex and making meow noises
That's not right, is it?
he'll eat me out, but god forbid we double dip when sharing salsa
Randomize
