My entire floor is waiting for the couple to come out of the shower. She's a screamer. We've blockaded them
hell no. last time, i couldn't pee straight for a week.
But it's not about our feelings, it's about making the men we sleep with feel awful about their lives
I'm like a magical alcohol dispenser. I pulled this kahlua out of my vagina.
The 3 year old I'm babysitting is the first guy to tell me he loves me sober in like 2 years
Watch out, there's a giant vagina in the quad running around screaming at people.
Its not chugging if its just one gulp
I'm sure the lady doing my pedicure could smell the sex on me.
I want to have sex with Will Smith. I guess I have a thing with 90s sitcom stars. Stamos, Joey Lawrence, John Goodman.
Drunk field day, hangover yoga and sober archery practice
His life is a porno. He snapped me while banging a girl in the back of the ambulance.
Sex and bbq. He sure knows how to make a girl feel special
My debit card was between my ass cheeks when i woke up. i vaguely remember putting it there for safe keeping
He said my vagina smelled like pomegranates. Its like my vagina is the fountain of youth.
sometimes i forget what nice tits i have and then i spend a month brushing my teeth naked in the front of the bathroom mirror, and i remember.
Randomize
