Who did Billy Mays play for?
A 20 minute car ride back to your car with the girl u had drunk anal with is the most uncomfortable thing ever.
& he told me 'I don't think ur a big slut-just kind of an average slut'
HE THINKS THATS A COMPLIMENT!!!!!
100% of annual heatstroke fatalities are preventable deaths! Don't let it happen to you! Also, you can catch crabs from almost anything! Be safe and have fun.
Typcal friday morning so far. Puke, shower, commute/puke, coffee, puke, coffee, bagel, good to go. Lunch today?
first party of the semester tomorrow. thinking of wearing a huge sign that says "my summer was good" to avoid the 67 questions and get straight to drinking
Rosemary is literally sitting on the ground holding on to the rug because she thinks she is going to fall if she lets go. We smoked way too much.
I'm using toast as a chaser. If I wasn't already so fucked up this would be revolting.
You told her that she shouldn't be allowed to wear clothes then when her roommate asked if you like her you said "no I just want to insert things into her"
I stand by it.
I really wanted to suck your dick, but I also didn't want to miss any of the movie
Just watched two people have sex in the pool. Hope you enjoy your yeast infection courtesy of the comfort inn.
Who put the fucking tampon in my Mike's hard lemonade?
the guy I've been trying to get with saw my brother's genitals before he saw mine, so that's my life.
i'm eating pizza lunchables and telling my boyfriend he can do better than me because i am a functional adult
I flushed a potato down the toilet so now we have to live in a hotel.
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