I wouldn't call it sex. It's like when you put a plug in a socket half way. It's not all the way in but it still turns on the light.
he just found out his girl is having a boy. he's probably googling "Ed Hardy diapers" as we speak.
Kanye's agent is the only person whose job sucks worse than mine.
I don't think I can fit "I'm sorry for ruining Christmas" on one cake. Better make two.
good thing vaginas are great cup holders
Sorry I didn't wanna double team his sister. Having whiskey dick and watching you get laid didn't sound appealing
Chinatown. Her fortune cookie said "accept the next proposition you receive." TELL ME NO NOW.
Hypothetical question. Say I was bleeding profusely, close to your house, and needed a place to go to clean up and perform minor surgery on myself. Like now.
if Anne Taylor knew what she did in her clothes, she'd be banned from the store.
oh come on, it's the perfect length summer dress to blow a stranger in the bathroom in
There are grandparents doing keg stands I don't know
We just catapulted a jelly bean off of his hard dick into his mouth.......Happy Easter!
I'm having leftover pizza for breakfast. I'm clearly not the greatest at this adult thing.
On the flip side, we did almost have sex wearing a gorilla mask and deer antlers.............
Of course he's seen my tits, I wave those things around like a trump supporter does an American flag
Did I turn a man straight...??
Yes!
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