my computer doesn't work...
why?
i puked on it last night
I feel like i'm in "To Catch a Predator - The Musical"
Stuck in the Dallas airport. At the bar. Everytime a flight to DC gets cancelled, I'm takin a shot. Fuck you snow.
When he came he kept saying "oh god oh god" and he sounded just like his dad. awkward...
Correct me if I'm wrong here... but did we serenade each others breasts to "winds of change" last night?
and then he put stevie wonder on to fuck to...and hummed along as I blew him
I knew it was different as soon as you told me you slept with him and didn't tell me about his dick
There's a stripper banging on the door demanding to see you.
his apartment was in a funeral home, walk of shamed through a visiation in the skankiest outfit i own
You know, there is no convenient place for your beer when you are on shrooms taking a shower.
While I was fucking him, he grabbed a taco off his shelf and started eating it. I had taco dripped on me. I have no idea where the taco came from.
i am bringing shame upon my ancesors with my weak liver valhalla will never accept me
It will be too late. I will have fornicated with the enemy by then.
What happened to no more shots?
It went out the window just like my dreams
Maybe you should slow down tonight...
KINGS DON'T NEED ADVICE FROM LITTLE HORN-BILLS FOR A START
Randomize
