why am i having a flashback about somewhere we were this weekend with music videos playing? Spike jonze brothers place?? Help me out
By the way the fattest man alive got married yesterday and I don't even have a boyfriend.
Can you send me a pic of you vag, I'm sexting the guy and he wants a pic but I didnt shave
dude are you serious?
I know you already have a pic on your phone
This is going to be a 3 day beach sex fest. Do you understand
You chanted SOFA PIZZA all night then we woke up to find about ten slices under the cushions where you were sleeping....
This honesty session brought to you by jagermeister inc.
Your roommates boyfriend just approached me while I was working to tell me about the staph infection he got on his face. Where do you find these people?
Did you sleep with Connor? And who undressed me? There's a picture of two guys peeing out my bedroom window. What happened?
That little tingle vodka gives me in my esphagus is what lets me know I'm still alive.
By the way, I'm pretty sure your husband is publicly advocating more BJs for my husband, via Facebook.
Apparently from about 3-5AM I was consoling that crying stripper about her life choices.
Also there's a home game tomorrow and I thought about holding up a sign that says, "I madeout with #64 during orientation week" would that be inappropriate??
Yeah, it was all very half-hearted. In the middle of sex we both just stopped and looked at each other and said, "can we just sleep instead?"
That is so sad.
It's been three years since Kelly shit in the to go box that we put in Sam's mailbox after we broke up. Considering Sam and I are friends again, should I finally tell him?
ya well i woke up to my roommate spraying me with windex...
Randomize
